Raj Arora may be interested. I am incorporating a company in the USA to make and market "Paan and Gutka" in America. I need a business partner there. A simple-minded fresh NRI would suit me best. 1) I have already paented varieties of Paan - Benarsi, Maithili, Bhojpuri, Kolkotta, "Kashmiri Mufti" and "Kashmiri Mufti ka Bheti" and so on. The last two Paans, if you are Hindu, you can only smell them, ownership will NOT be transferred to you. After smelling, you must return the Paan to the shop. But you must pay the same full price as muslims who can eat the paans. Hindus have to pay Kashmiris for nothing in return. That is in the Indian Constitution. 2) For brand ambassador, I am considering Brinda Karat or Arundhati Roy, being Pinkos already, you know. But Pinkos often ask for more money than capitalists, so I may have to ask Mrs.Madhuri Dixit Ram, who already lives in USA. 3) My advertising slogan will be, "Say No to Viagra, Say YES to Paan" - sex sells in KaliYug. 4) I will offer 50 cents refund for everyone who returns their "Paan juice" in the same plastic container. That way Raj Arora will be happy, see. 5) I will use this Paan Juice in a special "anti-theft" device I have invented. Because car thefts are high in the USA, my device will squirt Paan Juice on any simple-minded thief who tries to start the car without punching a code into my new device. As Raj Arora will confirm, Paan Juice will not wash off easily. We can catch the thief easily.
RE:A New NRI Company to Market
by Kris iyer on Aug 10, 2008 08:21 AM Permalink
New NRI MNC for Paan and Gutka.... Owner Kris iyer...... There is more to Paan in Indian culture than some simple-minded people realise. Paan was used by ancient Hindus as an "aphrodisiac". I think even fresh NRIs know what this term means. Vatsyayana - some NRIs may not know who this person was - the author of Kama Sutra mentions very nice formulae for making "special" Paans. Since I read a bit of Sanskrit, I have the secret recipes. Some foreign firms making viagra have been trying to steal these secret recipes from me. That is why these days, I dress like Raj Arora and go about cursing every Indian chewing paan. That way, the spies will think, I am totally against Paan. Vatsyayana thinks - I agree with him - Indian women look stunningly beautiful after chewing Paan. Their eyes and limbs glow, they smile in a very inviting glitz, all very irresistible even to Sanyasis. When Menaka was trying to disturb Viswamitra's Tapas, she had chewed Paan before approaching him. That is in the Purana I am writing now. Paan slows down metabolism and the heart-rate, so strong emotions like anger are mitigated. If Hitler had chewed Paan, he would have been a peace-loving person. Hindus and Muslims who chew Paan together never fight with each other. They remain life-long friends. I know it by experience and observation. In fact, I told my friend Mush over the phone to take Paan Suphari with Zirdari and Nawaz (also my friends), then all this impeachment talk would be forgotten.
RE:A New NRI Company to Market
by Kris iyer on Aug 10, 2008 10:27 AM Permalink
New NRI Multi-national to make and market Paan... Owner Kris iyer
See, such a small matter as Paan, Indian Culture has so much to say about it. I have 100 pages of material on it, to make a small book.
1) I have linked Paan and only Indian women. Pak., readers may be wondering why I have not mentioned Pak., women. Khushwant Singh and I tried different Paans on our respective Pak. girl friends. No, it did not make any difference in them. They still looked the same lumpy, fearsome, heavy women with a threatening stare. Sorry to all my Pak. friends, who write under names as Sharma, Arora, Sastry. May be something to do with Islam, their women are not sexy. KK Sahadevan says that is why Islam advises full veil for all their women. Also explains one of the reasons for the expansion of Islam, I guess. In fact, when I was in Pak., at times, I could not tell, just looking at the faces, any difference between their men and women. Raja of Swat explained that is another reason for the full veil. It is easier to differentiate, see. You see a figure in a veil, that will be a woman (But occasionally it could be a man also, if you see the figure near Lal Masjid).
Khushwant and I tried Paan on our Gori girl friends. The Italians and the Irish came out best. The trouble was, Khushwant and I had to run because after chewing our Paan these Goris were after us, real bad, you know.
Such are the mysteries of Indian Culture. You name any topic I can tell you the Indian Culture in it.
RE:A New NRI Company to Market
by raj arora on Aug 10, 2008 02:20 PM Permalink
lol so u think im paki ah lol no dude u got it wrong im and ex indian who says it as it is ,pak is a worse pog sty than india and tats for sure
RE:A New NRI Company to Market
by Devavrata Satya on Aug 10, 2008 08:18 PM Permalink
You do not merely say it as it is, Mr. arora, you also take the liberty of forecasting how it always will be.
You say you are an ex-Indian. Have you changed your ethnic origin when you got the green card? Are you now Italian or Irish? The point, Mr. arora, is that you can give up your citizenship, but the shameful fact that this country called India was unfortunate enough to bring you forth and hold you back as long as it did cannot be erased.