My relationship ended nearly 6 months ago with the first boy i ever fell in love with. i decided that i wanted to go away for college and he was always determined that he would travel. although its 5 months since we last saw each other, i still think about him everyday. i still cry when i think about him and even though im at the beginning of a new r'ship, im not sure if i can go through with it. i always thought we would be together and although we'r apart, each of our friends still tell us that we ask about each other. the thing is, even if i did see him again, although i want to be with him, i dnt know if it's a good idea to let myself. he broke my heart badly and if he hurt me again i dnt think i could love someone else. its too hard. if i am lucky enough to find someone in the future, i believe that i will always compare that person to my first love. im not sure if time is a healer, i just think that we have to force ourselves to believe that we can love another, but never be in love with anyone other than that first love. i wish this wasnt true but maybe thats just life!
