a new daughter in law should always adjust from her toothpaste, eating habits to breathing at her in laws just becoz she does not have her own entity ??? ha girl child!!!!! its ok if her mil says anything as shes the inferior or ulterior girl child!!!!! ha girl child. she has to manage all the washing cleaning kids plus work !!!! ha girl child.if she gives birth to another girl ohhhhhhh its a headache for the family more than for those who will look after her!!! ha girl child. we do everything to protect that little innocent infant from being killed right???? but sorry she is being killed everyday in our homes , society, in our narrow minds. why is she ridiculed if she is in a bikini were we born with clothes?????? think why have we got insane, GOD made us beautiful and our personal parts too we are to be revered thats why GOD did not send us with clothes on, ha girl child....Have u seen a man in a burkha at 12 years of age in the blazing heat (other than a gangster or terrorist for camouflage)!!! ha girl child think about it!!!!! dont just keep doing things for the saw called girlchild uselessly!!!!
i have been a victum of the so called indian male dominated society. though being well settled and well read. i was thrown out of the house at midnight, just because i couldn't meet with my inlaws and husbands requirements.on the top of it i have been slapped with a bitter divorce. And now i have become an easy prey for all the men folk around. My mother, who was widowed at a younger age, nurtured me for best studied, but has miserably failed in the society. So as per my view, educating girl child is not the only solution, the entire society should be sensitized about the girl child.
RE:its useless
by sivasubramanian on Apr 14, 2008 06:08 PM Permalink
Dear neha, Your fault is you were looking for only Sharma, You don't look for a guy who was your classmate /neighbour etc get mixed with the person who loves you,and as Jesus says be tenative with your fellow man also. Why no such Eveteasing in europe because there the boys and girls are broad minded and live to their heart.Indian society is biased when they go to school itself they were trained to be biased.The same increases as their level/age increases in the society.When i am in college i am proposing equality in all,Now i am the biggest casteist.The world had changed me.The parents are not all the time correct.Particularly when deciding about the girl's-man and man's carreer.
My request to madam Shahani and rediffmail is that such type of cases as is mine should be brought to the public and many more such cases will come forward where women because of their family hitch only not coming to the open and culprit males are enjoying and making more and more females their prey. I request that a strong stand should be taken and given a hand to such type of women to come open and unveil this type of happenings to the public so that culprit should not move openely shamelessly and be punished severely. I have started studying law and made myself so strong that oneday i will definitely do favour to me. I am very hopefully waiting for the day when i will be able to do justice to myself.. Hope rediff and madam Shahani will also take interest amd help me in the same to get back my money and peace and sanity to me. God is there and he wil also help me now. I thing this i was trapped into the incident so that i could expose such type of cases in the public and be more strong and help others also.
I also had undergone one such incident a few years back. A man in my locality came into my contact and after repeated visits he made a secure place amongst the family members and as well as with me. I used to keep a large gap as far as closness was there. That man got married in between and in due course i started confiding in him and used to discuss our family matter amongst each other. Time passed and somehow i had a problem in the family, left the job of bank, i was working and in the meantime my husband also had some problem in his services and we really had a tough time. My family relation were getting disturbed and at that time that man build a confidence in me and used to always propogate me to work of my own. He was working for some clothes mills and i too was interested in doing something like having a boutique of some sort. He told me to visit some of the exporter, to whom he was knowing and that way we started going togather out jointly. Now when he saw that now this lady is very much close to him he started building personal relations with me. I was very much depressed those days and could not understand his intentions and sold my gold also for the investment of opening of boutique because i didnot had any other alternative. when that man was fully convinced that he had a control over me, one day fradulently build personal relations with me and left me in the lurch and now he himself made a complaint in the police that i was harassing him. i am in a fix now.
it must be mandatory for all girls to take karate class. further, they must have a right to a free hot pepper spray. muslim girl should have a right to marry hindu boys.
The girl child in backward states are least educated. Educate the population specially the girls to make social progress. Education is the key to better life, that is why the evil caste system denied education to the masses, to keep them weak and meek. Jyotiba Phule from Maharastra was almost murdered by the castiest elite from Maharashtra since he tried to educate the lower caste girls. Fortunately these vested intrests with hateful hearts failed and many women got education.
RE:Education is the key to a better, dignified life
by Alpha Male on Mar 09, 2008 12:50 AM Permalink
Do you know that everybody is talking about rights of women. But nobody is talking about rights of men. Why that discrimination. Most laws are against men.
RE:Education is the key to a better, dignified life
by Kumar on Mar 08, 2008 09:05 AM Permalink
Everyone in a family should demand education specially the girls. The ignorant fathers who refuse education to their children should be pressurised by the family, neighbours and the legal system to send all the kids to school.
RE:A litmus test
by Kumar on Mar 08, 2008 09:02 AM Permalink
The girl child in backward states are least educated. Educate the population specially the girls to make social progress. Education is the key to better life, that is why the evil caste system denied education to the masses, to keep them weak and meek. Jyotiba Phule from Maharastra was almost murdered by the castiest elite from Maharashtra since he tried to educate the lower caste girls. Fortunately these vested intrests with hateful hearts failed and many women got education.
I want to inform you the consequences of one-sided news reports and laws. Take the example of the domestic violence act. It is plain draconian. Anyone who is educated and reads the guidelines of the law can see how vicious this law is and what it's social implications will be. On the face of it, the law appears to be a blessing for people in abusive or violent relationships. However, a careful analysis reveals that, under the ploy of %u201Cwomen and children welfare%u201D, this law is yet another misguided attempt to enact legislation to grant women legal supremacy over men and to create a society where men are deprived of their rights.
There are three fundamental problems with this law %u2013 a) it is overwhelmingly gender biased in favor of women, b) the potential for misuse is astounding and c) the definition of domestic violence is too expansive.The DV act singles out men as perpetrators of domestic violence and assumes that only women are victims. As per this law, only a woman can file a complaint against her male partner. A man, who is a victim of domestic violence, has no rights under this law. The fact is that it has been comprehensively proven in numerous studies [please see references] that women are no less abusive as men in intimate relationships.
RE:To Rediff.com and others on this site.
by looking for u on Mar 07, 2008 09:17 PM Permalink
Giving such sweeping legal powers to women while withholding protection to male victims is tantamount to systematic legal victimization of men. In the western world, the domestic violence laws are gender neutral and provide protection to the victims, both men and women. The fact that the Indian version explicitly prohibits any male victim to seek relief under this law defies all logic and is beyond comprehension.
The second significant flaw in this law is that it lends itself to such easy misuse that women will find it hard to resist the temptation to %u201Cteach a lesson%u201D to their male relatives and will file frivolous and false cases. A similar trend is already being observed in the case of anti-dowry law (498a), which is being misused to such an extent that the Supreme Court has termed it %u201CLegal Terrorism%u201D. To illustrate how easy it is to misuse the DV law, consider the scenarios below. [She means wife/female live-in partner and he means husband/male live-in partner]
a) If she demands any amount of money from him, for any reason whatsoever, he is legally bound to pay that amount in full, failing which he can be imprisoned. Under the pretext of preventing economic abuse of women, this law legalizes the extortion of money by women. Interestingly, if he asks for money from her, he can be jailed for that as well. Furthermore, he is responsible for paying the rent if the couple resides in a shared rented accommodation.
RE:RE:To Rediff.com and others on this site.
by Alpha Male on Mar 07, 2008 09:19 PM Permalink
right to the residence. This is a very convenient means of getting control of the house regardless of whether she has any legal right on the property. Moreover, if he is booked under DV, he is responsible for paying the rent as well, even though he may not be allowed to live in the house or he might even be in jail.
c) If she decides not to cook and wishes to eat out in a restaurant everyday, he cannot afford not to oblige, lest he invites the DV provision for %u201Cnot providing food%u201D, for which he could be jailed. d) If she has an affair and he tries to prevent her from meeting her lover, he could be punished under the DV act, as he is preventing her from meeting someone.
e) He can be booked under the DV act if she feels that she has been insulted. Insult is a relative term, which is totally left to her discretion. Interestingly, if she insults and abuses him verbally or even physically, he does not have any legal recourse in this law
These are just some of the ways in which women can exploit men in a legally permitted manner. The fact that the complaint by a woman will be treated, prima facie, as %u201Ctrue and genuine%u201D opens up a whole new realm of possibilities where innocent men will be accused and implicated in false cases, just because they refuse to give in to her unreasonable demands. Most people readily agree that the law will be misused. Their counter arguments generally are
a) The number of miuses will be very low OR every law is misused %u2013 The objective of a
RE:RE:RE:To Rediff.com and others on this site.
by Alpha Male on Mar 07, 2008 09:21 PM Permalink
any law should be to punish the guilty and protect the innocent. The persecution of innocents cannot be justified in any circumstances. As is the case with 498a, this law will be heavily misused in urban India.
b) If she is happy, then why will she file a complaint %u2013 Ah ! So, the man exists at the mercy of the woman. If the wife wants to kick out old parents from home or wants to pursue an affair and should the man dare to object, she can get him incarcerated with alacrity. Any law that forcefully subjects a section of a society to conduct as per the pleasure of another section is deemed oppressive and should be vehemently opposed.
c) There are other provisions to deal with the misuse of this law %u2013 The fact is that there are other legal provisions to deal with domestic violence as well. If a strict law is made for a specific purpose, then the provisions for dealing with its misuse should be in the law itself. The third major flaw in this law is that it provides an all-encompassing definition of domestic violence and some terms (insults, name calling) are extremely subjective. The radical feminists claim that 70% of women in India face domestic violence which comes as no surprise as even an insult is considered domestic violence. Interestingly, they are mum on how many indian men suffer domestic violence using the same criteria. This law strikes at the very foundation of marriage by promoting
RE:RE:RE:RE:To Rediff.com and others on this site.
by Alpha Male on Mar 07, 2008 09:22 PM Permalink
intolerance and litigation for petty domestic disputes. It is universally recognized that from time to time differences arise in a marriage and sometimes people, both men and women, behave in hurtful ways towards each other. Most people, though, are able to work them out and lead a more or less happy life with their loved one. However, this law makes it very easy to escalate the domestic problems in daily life to such a level that it eventually leads to a breakdown in marriage. Once a man has been accused of domestic violence for a something relatively minor (insult), while he might have been subjected to the same treatment from her, he will perpetually feel threatened by his partner and that is the beginning of the end. This law will lead to more divorces, broken homes and the children will pay the ultimate price by getting deprived of a pleasant childhood.
There are degrees of domestic violence and not all conflicts in a relationship can be termed as domestic violence. This law trivializes the issue of domestic violence by including minor differences in its realm and by explicitly denying protection to half of the population.
The law in its current form is grossly inadequate to tackle the problem of domestic violence. It imposes a lot of responsibility on men, without giving them rights. On the other hand, it gives lots of rights to women without requiring them to be responsible. At the very minimum, it should be made gender neutral, offering protection to both men an
Re: To Rediff.com and others on this site.
by pdk seveneighty on Sep 15, 2008 09:54 AM Permalink
Ms. Alpa, you are very right in all this. Thanks. Pratibhadk
