The current scenario reminds me of a science fiction book called "Brave New World" by Aldrous Huxley. There, in a futuristic society, marriages don't exist. People are slaves to technology, and spend their lives as individuals. They have sex with holograms to satiate their sexual desires. For reproduction, test-tube babies are produced in artificial wombs with genetic engineering.. We maybe heading for that scenario.. Scary.
RE:Brave New World
by door drishti on Aug 07, 2007 06:29 PM Permalink
its simple stupid ...what's the religion of ur dogs and cats ...offcourse ur religion ...how can we forget that our religion is supreme and the only way to achieve the salvation
friends ..don't get befooled by those commies ...fight for ur religion
Indians can blend our cultural heritage towards marriage and western views on women freedom...
Till such time, divorce rates are set to go up and will come down automatically..
Now it is the period of learning curve..
To me following are the reasons,
1. Eventhough IT guys are educated, their attidude towards women are old-dated and rotten...So whenever a guy found his gf / wife get socialising with collegues, he expresses his chauvnastic behavoiur...Jealousy is a natural thing and common to man & women...but Men have to act in a metured way...(for what? to save the marriage)..And unfortunately the same is the case with ladies also who can not accept husband's way of corporate lifestle...
2. Earning huge bucks does not make a happy life..If guys/gals are drawn into materialistic world, no one is there to blame except themselves.. We should adopt yearly vacations as being done by Foreigners...
RE:Divorce
by anjali on Aug 09, 2007 09:06 PM Permalink
Very sensible comments by Sengathir. I wish there were more sensible men like you who could make our present and old generation understand our points.
RE:Divorce
by Rakesh Bhandary on Aug 07, 2007 04:08 PM Permalink
Well said Mr Selvan. I have to point out that these IT guys we are talking about here are literate, they are certainly not educated (and applies to other professionals too). You may just look at the behaviour of such people in public places, where they seem to have a total lack of respect for others. And not to mention their road mannerisms.
The other view that I fully agree with is Mr Rehman's, where he ahs pointed out the attitude of some (actually majority) girls always want a 'highly-educated, well earning, good family' guy, even if the girl is a graduate (does not hold out much in todays world). On the other hand, the guys parents always look out for 'fair skinned' female. And we talk about racism in other countries. I can think of a good example here. If a girl completes her MB BS, her parents by default assume that she should get a foreign based post-raduate doctor and consider a guy with MB BS only as inferior.
But hey, what are you going to do? Our so called 'glorious culture' invaribly teaches it's younger generation to discriminate right from childhood, when young minds are impressionable.
I remember as a young successful doctor and having taken it for granted that I had made it, I found to my utter surprise that I had no demand in the marriage market!I had to swallow a lot of my pride before getting married having being reminded what a 'meherbani' it was!
We as INDIANS have a lot of soul searching to do We burst crackers when Sunita Williams makes it to Earth, Sania Mirza moves up the rankings, and some westerner praises our culture.
But we shouldn't forget that we are all a little crooked inside. Divorce and suicide are just some sypmtoms of our disease called "crookedness."
Well if marriages are falling apart only due to sexual frustration, then sluts wd be a better option than wives.Trust is more more imp than anything else..these days and if u do not trust each other, then regardless of the profession, marriages wd def be on the rocks!
show your wife you love her. tell her she is pretty. surprise her with small but meaningful things. help her with kitchen chores, like doing the dishes, taking out the garbage. help her build her confidence.
RE:simple ideas of successful marriage
by Rimy Bhatt on Aug 07, 2007 12:47 PM Permalink
Pradip , you really know the secret of happy marriage, I think every women just wants that , nothing more-the love, respect and a feeling that she is bieng cared by her husband.The other helps here or there simply makes her to love you madly. Itz so simple to impress ur wife by these smaller changes in men's attitude- SO MEN, GIVE IT A TRY !!!!
RE:simple ideas of successful marriage
by on Aug 07, 2007 04:47 AM Permalink
and what else need to be done. if you require to do that always , then she is sucker...
it is mutual , either work at home , showing effection etc.
either you or your wife feeling of insecurity required to go extra mile to please each other ... suckers ..........
RE:simple ideas of successful marriage
by jagadish achar on Aug 07, 2007 12:37 PM Permalink
IF WE DO LIKE THIS WE WILL BE THROWN OUT BY OUR BOSSES,THIS KIND OF SITUATION IS CREATED BY THESE SO CALLED IT COS,WHERE THEY EARN SOMUCH OF MONEY BY MAKING TO WORK LONGER HOURS,AND LOOSING OUR FAMILY RELATIONSHIP,WHERE WE ARE NOT ABLE TO ENJOY OUR FAMILY TIES,DUE TO WORK STRESS.WHEN CAN WE HAVE DINNER WHEN WE GO LATENIGHT DUE,WHEN CAN WE HELP HER .
Why divorces - Financial freedom with different spending habbits & goals - One knows that - "I can live without" my spouse. - You can easily get married twice or get partner - Movies prove that point
Now a days both the parties dont understand the spiritual bond of marriage, but think of it as free pass for enjoyment.
Because if it was about fights then our grand parents also use to fight i remember - when fed up my grandpa/grandma use to say I am leaving home & going to stay alone in temple, but still grandma will wait for grandpa for dinner and grandpa will rub iodex on grandma's ankle because he says she works whole day and house is run by her.
Now this is because they had real love...and so our parents.
Those days marriages would work because they had common goal, better life for their kids(next generation) & not their own betterment.
Also in some of the discussions below I saw someone saying to work with women is difficult.
It is 50% true because all indian women - when go on mat. leave then they mis-use work from home right - not ready to work late night at least on-site - not ready to travel for overnight stay(at least in US i have seen) - on weeknds not ready to go to work.
But I will still blame both the parties as they have to look inside & remember that good "parents" makes the strong & happy future generation.
if they want to be seprtaed, let them separate, whats the problem, every one is independent to choose there life, generally in our nation INDIA, marriges are with post and degrees not with the person, and divorce is a result of post and degree, parents from girl or boy side are mostly looking degrees and money, so face the music
RE:problem kya hai
by purvi chawla on Aug 06, 2007 05:38 PM Permalink
really good one! i agree a girls parents look for IT professional with high packages but no time whereas their daughter wants both money & time from hubby which is not possible & finally leads to this
RE:problem kya hai
by Bharat Vaidya on Aug 06, 2007 09:20 PM Permalink
If they want to separate,why do they first enter the holy bond of marriage?This is purely a western influenced.Since I T professionals are mostly in touch with Western countries,they follow their pattern of society.Our cultural roots are more than 5000 years old.Western and Industrial age is just about 200 years old.So I don't think one should blindly take the help of law to get separated.One must think spritually and beyond to get separated from the holy bond of Marriage.
RE:problem kya hai
by Sameer Bhagwat on Aug 06, 2007 11:21 PM Permalink
They are separating as their physical needs are not met. Nothing spiritual about it!!
RE:problem kya hai
by jagadish achar on Aug 07, 2007 12:45 PM Permalink
why do they want to waste their parents money simply,let the live with whom they want,and enjoy their life.
