I think its time for the society to rethink whether they are just animals or human beings which according to Bg. Gita comes after 84,00,000 painful births and death. Human life is very precious and made to understand the truth. Certainly it is the most elevated form of life in this mortal world that my scientist friends will also agree as well as proved in Vedas which are age old scriptures. Sex is necessary but the act differs from animals to human beings. Like dogs human beings are not expected to perform on road so as the choice of partner and no. of partners. We have to abide by certain rules and regulations called self control or Sense control also to be called as human beings.
So WATCH OUT my friends if you want to carried out by the call of your senses ( ignoring the intelligence that God has given to all).
I agree with the author of this article.I believe, marriage brings two human beings together and only when you are emoionally attached to someone, you can have a pleasurable experience.
I wholehearted agree with your views and it only says you are a woman not naïve, nor prudish or old fashioned. The worst animal on the planet called Men can only carry out the wild suggestions from your flamboyant friend, and the thinking she has of having sex only for fun. And not all men can carry this for too long. Well I think not any man can carry it for life. Infact, I think your flamboyant friend is naïve, as she cannot foresight that she will be left picking the pieces and will feel totally used and wasted exactly like your other friend but in her case after few years. A man might walk away after having enough fun in a similar fashion as the married man (in your other friends case) did. And the simple reason is we both man are woman are different. So all you woman please stop fighting for equality bcos were different, are different and will be different. A simple explanation with a muscial note would be the verses from the song of movie Ram teri ganga meli stating Nadi aur nari ke ek hi kahani hai...
As the water/river takes the shape of jar in which it is. Woman usually get moulded or accustomed very easily into whatever the circumstances
I think your friend saying that it is a totally biological thing is totally wrong, but I do think we are made to have sex. With that in mind, one needs to consider other's feelings. I have had premarital sex and it was always consensual and from my point of view, my partner and myself did not have emotional problems when we broke up.
I am now married and wouldn't dream of hurting my wife by having sex with someone else, but I actually think I am a better lover because of the multiple partners I have had. My wife would agree and says she is better because of multiple partners. That being said, it is not for everyone.
I say as long as no one is hurting anyone, than to each their own. Though I do think alot of people, both male & female, do not think enough about what they are doing and do end up hurting themselves, their partner or someone else.
e) Again, check ur facts ... why do u think men / woman secretly wish their spouses to be like brad pitt / angelina jolie ???? Cause of the outside beauty. but since not everyone is lucky, one has t omake do with whatever s/he gets to satisfy his/her urges. So when in heat, guys mite prostitues and gals mite opt for gigolos. Im sure u have never heard these words before ... lol
f) Mutual consent is necessary again cause we DO respect others choices. where its not present, the act is termed rape. rape is nothing but crushing the very individuality of a person, so that leaves a big sacr on the individual psyche.
U cannot reduce it to biological act .. but thats zactly wot it is supp to be. It again we, the superior higher species who have nothing better in life to do than complicate simple things like fornications.
And about ur second friend, well .. wot d hell did she expect when she was told in milder words that shes going to be his mistress ? The expectations were already setup, so she had to face the consequence of a "broken dream" if she had any dream.
I wud agree wid ur first friend ... " we all need sex " sex remains sex but wen u connect emotionally, it becomes makin love .. which is another blasted concept introduced by romantics like u. I am answerin ur questions in d order in which they were asked.
a) privacy :- religion ( and their various pimps ) over the period of time conditioned people to believe sex is a bad thing to do, the original sin. So over d years, ppl feel guilty abd wud rather not do it in public.
b) Lookin face to face isjust a lack of knowledge of positions .... or mebbe ppl r nervous abt it n follow d tried, easier n tested method of the missionary position. Lookin in the eyes or not is not a necesssity while making out. It does make the experience a lil better though.
c) We wud continue having sex all the continue if possible. Man / woman are not merely social animals ... they are sexual creatures as well.
d) We dont have a mating season cause we are not "stupid" animals. We are higher species and are capable to make our own choices. the instirument / organ which we use to do this is caled brains ( incase you have never heard about it )
Dear Sarah, Its very interseting to have ur thoughts and its very refreshing and in some way it was a myth shattering one too as we Indians think u westerners to be very bold and open to love making and having sex. But u've at least proved me wrong. Frankly speaking I too am of the opinion that yes one should be indulged in sex only after marriage bcoz sex is thing that has not only to do with one's physical satisfaction but also with mental upliftment. You 've hit the nail right on the head when u say "...physically, a rape victim heals rapidly, but the mental and emotional damage does not. The sense of shame, hurt, betrayal, depression, nightmares and even sexual dysfunction can continue for years. If sex was just another act, why such deep trauma?" Sex is a sacred thing. Some minutes earlier I was discussing with one of my friends on pre-marital sex and he was saying that what is the guarantee that the life partner I'll get will be virgin. My answer to ppl like him is "If u r true to urself atleast u can hope and demand with pride with ur lifepartner that u've been true to her all ur life and ask 4 the same from atleast from now on Even if she is not virgin."
