Dear Writer, You have made a very good point. Human sex cannot be compared to any other sexual behaviour exhibited by animals mainly because Humans have the power to rationalize, reason and make decisions which can even go against the given laws of nature. An Animal will have sex within the laws as governed by nature. But Humans are the only race who have invented different methods of pleasure seeking. A lot of people suffer from guilt after consenting to pre-marital sex. For some the effects start showing only after they have entered into a serious relationship. Your friend might be talking about having an affair for the heck of it. But What if she enters into a relationship at a later stage and that person cannot satisfy her the way her other partners did. She would easily turn out into a pleasure seeker from outside and this in turn could harm her future relationships. And it has been proved that the best and the most fulfilling sex happens only with the person that you truly love. Marriage gives a name to the relationship and the pleasure you seek is completely guilt free and also very healthy. I really liked your write-up. Keep up the good work
To justify sex withing marriage then you should fall in love only after marriage. The whole world should start having arranged marriage for that matter.
The reason I say this is because if you read your entire article all over again. You will realize that the justifications you have given against having sex outside marriage applies to love as well.
This is off the topic, I wish there was a way to track this topic so I could know I can go back to this article but I am not sure if it is possible so I don't think I would be coming back to this topic again and reading any reply. So wanted to say Thank you Sarah for a nice article worth reading. :)
Hi I fully agree with u.In modern times when almost every 1 is into premarital sex I personally wont do so Also one of my friends said our viginity is the only gift we can give our husbands other things he can aquire himself.I am 26 & unmarried with many sexual fantacies which i will fulfil in my married life
I appreciate your thoughts.... When all the other writers on similar sites (including rediff) are hell bent upon "westernizing" our culture... Keep Writing. Cheers,
You have mentioned your reasoning on why you would not want to have sex because it is not just a biological act, because it is a personal and intimate encounter. Very true. But, the reasons explain the above points and do not justify why sex cannot be had outside marriage. The only point being that it can leave one shattered and broken. But it depends on who the two individuals are. If a woman plans to have an "affair" with a married man, then yes, she is asking for trouble. But, if the two individuals have no strings attached, are mature enough to understand the sensitivity. I see no problem.
What about individuals who do not plan to marry at all because of certain beliefs they have against the institution of marriage? It would be unrealistic to expect these individuals to not experience what happens between two consenting adults.
I fully agree with you and I think there is no reason why you should feel that your ideas or conviction is outdated I think, its as true, contemperory and relevant as the Sun, moon or a life on earth! Shriprakshsingh
Hi i completely agree with u and having same views about it.I myself is 28 yrs.old and still waiting my marriage to happen for this and i m not going to give myself for a one night stands or anything.I do want it to happen with full commitment and a sincere promise for my whole life should be there before going for this.
I write to you as another 30 year old who turned that corner in March this year.
Well I completely agree with you and your views. I could not have put those arguments and thoughts any better. Forget what your colleagues or other friends think about it, you have my absolute support on your views.
I am confused to the hilt to know about two years back that students do not want to get married because of the 'boredom' associated with a life-long committment. They asked one of my former married colleauge how she could visualise staying married for the rest of her life with the same person??!! And these children were happily doing it in abandoned cars in and around their campus.
Anyway, it was really pleasant reading your views and knowing that I am not alone in this world who holds such 'out-dated', 'out-of-sync.' and 'silly' views on sex and marriage.
Take care and all the best in finding a mature, sensitive, intelligent, humorous person to be your life-partner.
